Man on trial for setting dad’s home on fire in Lakewood says he only wanted to harm himself

A man accused of setting fire inside his father’s Lakewood home said he was in so much “unbearable” physical and emotional pain he wanted to die.

However, a McHenry County prosecutor challenged Connor Kirkpatrick on the stand during his jury trial Tuesday as to whether he knew that pouring gasoline in the garage and throughout the house could cause damage.

Kirkpatrick, 30, often stammered, trailed off and spoke in whisper as he maintained that when he set the fire during the early hours of May 20, 2023, his “intention” was not to cause damage but to kill himself.

Kirkpatrick is charged with arson and residential arson, according to records in the McHenry County court.

At the time of the fire, his father was on vacation in Florida. Kirkpatrick was living with his father and was on pretrial release for charges stemming from him crashing his vehicle into a Crystal Lake home. In that case, he is charged with felony criminal damage, aggravated reckless driving and reckless conduct, and that case is still pending. This week’s trial in McHenry County courtroom of Judge Tiffany Davis is only on the arson charges.

The crash, on July 27, 2022, seriously injuring the owner of the Crystal Lake home.

In opening arguments, Assistant State’s Attorney Justin Neubauer told jurors that the night before the fire, Kirkpatrick sent his father a text saying, “I wanna set everything on fire and watch it burn.” In later testimony, Kirkpatrick said he also sent the text to his mother who lives in Chicago but neither parent responded. His father did not see the text until hours later when he received a phone call from Lakewood police saying his house had been set on fire, according to testimony.

The text, which also addressed his pain, was later shown to jurors. In the days leading to the fire, Kirkpatrick testified he had been in “unbearable” pain from the crash and he couldn’t sleep.

After the fire, police found Kirkpatrick wandering the streets and took him to the hospital. He initially lied, Neubauer said, and told police he woke up at 3 a.m. smelling smoke and found the house was on fire. He later admitted to police he “took gas from the garage and started the fire,” Neubauer said.

Kirkpatrick’s defense attorney, William Bligh, asked jurors in opening arguments to listen to all evidence and pay close attention to the video evidence be played during trial.

“Listen to it, absorb it, process it,” Bligh said. He asked not to make up their minds “until it’s time to deliberate. ... I am confident you will find him not guilty.”

Eleven days after the fire, Lakewood Police Sgt. Sean McGrath, who also testified Tuesday, said he picked up Kirkpatrick from a mental health facility in Waukegan and drove him to McHenry County jail, where he was taken into custody on the arson charges.

McGrath’s body-cam footage, recorded during the drive, also was played in court. In the video, Kirkpatrick is heard saying he wanted to tell the sergeant what happened that morning. He was “very confused” that morning and in a lot of pain from injuries to his arm. He said his pain was “10 out of 10,” “excruciating” and so bad his “vision went black.” Prior to the fire he had gone to a hospital for help, which he did not get, he said. He also had an appointment with a pain management doctor, but that had been rescheduled for a month later, Kirkpatrick said.

He was in so much pain he wanted to take his life, and the fire was not any sort of retaliation against his father, Kirkpatrick told McGrath.

On the stand Tuesday Kirkpatrick said about 2:30 a.m. to 2:45 a.m. he went out to have a cigarette because it would help with his pain. But as he stood in the garage in “sheer agony” while at a “breaking point psychologically” he thought of suicide and ways to carry it out. He testified that his father did not have any firearms in the house, there was no noose and no medicine he could overdose on.

“I started a fire,” Kirkpatrick said. “I wanted to end the pain.”

When he was driving with McGrath he said he first tried to kill himself by lighting his clothes on fire but when he tried that, he said, it “lasted about 90 seconds” and it ”hurt way too much to be on fire” so he put it out, he told McGrath.

He piled up branches and yard waste in the garage and poured gas on it. He also poured gas throughout the single-story house. He lit the pile on fire in the garage and it spread, he said. In later testimony, he said the fire spread faster than he expected and that he was hit with a ball of fire and left the house. Jurors saw photos Tuesday of the garage and inside the home of damage by fire and smoke.

“My intention was to die on my bed of smoke inhalation,” Kirkpatrick told McGrath.

When Kirkpatrick left the house, he said he banged on neighbors' doors for help. When no one answered, he walked to a nearby fire station, but kept walking when he didn’t see anyone there. He’d hoped to stop someone driving by and ask if he could use their phone. His phone was damaged in the fire, he said, adding he was bleeding “a lot” and in a lot of pain.

McGrath said he later saw Kirkpatrick on Crystal Lake Avenue and picked him up. The sergeant said he asked Kirkpatrick about the text he sent to his father saying he wanted to set everything on fire and watch it burn.

Kirkpatrick testified he sent it hoping his father would reach out to him, that it was a cry for help and he wanted his father to call him and reassure him that he was going to be OK, McGrath said.

Closing arguments are set for Wednesday morning.