An Extraordinary Life: Shorewood man embodied ‘respect, politeness and deference’

When Mary LaLonde’s son Mark LaLonde of Shorewood was just 10, he promised to learn to play her favorite piece by Beethoven: Bagatelle No. 25 in A minor for solo piano, commonly known as “Für Elise.”

Mark received his first keyboard when he was 9 and his first guitar when he was 8. Mark did have guitar lessons but he taught himself the piano.

And sure enough, Mark, shortly after he made that promise, learned the piece by ear and played it for her.

“It was one of the most touching things he ever played for me,” Mary said.

Mary said Mark was “an old soul” who never parted with his first guitar. Mark loved “all kinds of music,” she said, from 1950s to the present, secular and Christian – Marks’ favorite band for some time was Third Day, Mary said.

Mark also played the drums and did woodworking. He could paint a house, put up drywall and install wood flooring, although Mark was union boilermaker by trade and a “fantastic welder,” Mary said.

“He was the type of guy that he could do anything he put his mind to,” Mary said. “He was ‘Jack of all trades’…he bought his first house at age 23, gutted the whole interior and remodeled the whole house, It was just beautiful. Whatever he did, he did to the best that he could.”

Man of God

Mark also helped out with youth ministry at Judson Church in Joliet when his cousin worked in ministry, too, Mary said. A born-again Christian, Mark developed a love for his Bible and read it often on his lunch break, Mary said.

But Mark also had an adventurous streak. He rode all over the Midwest with his friends on his Harley Davidson. After his death, Mary heard some of the stories from Mark’s friends on how he helped people – such as the woman and children in the broken-down car when they stopped to get gas, she said.

“He got his buddies and they fixed the car and gave the woman some money for the kids,” Mary said. “He never mentioned it to me. He was so humble. He never bragged about anything he did. He cared deeply about other people and tried to help them. A divorced person [he knew] was having a hard time and he tried to get him to come to church.”

Mark’s brother Paul LaLonde wrote the following in his blog post, “The Time That Is Given to Us: A Eulogy,” that “Mark embodied the timeless virtues of respect, politeness, and deference. He was a man of God and tried to live his life as devoutly as he could. He carried a Bible with him, and his handshake was textbook right down to the firm grip and eye contact. He made sure to represent the values our parents and grandparents instilled in us – and he didn’t let them down.”

Friend to all

Christopher Wright of New Lenox called Mark his best friend and union “brother” – someone with whom he misses talking with every day, he said. But then, Christopher and Mark have been friends since the fifth grade at St. Dennis Catholic School in Lockport.

“He was kind-hearted, generous with his time and one of the best people I’ve ever known,” Christopher said. “Mark was a great person. It’s just hard to explain how.”

Like Mary, Christopher called Mark “an old soul,” someone who owned a many books and preferred reading to technology.

“That’s unusual for today’s times,” Christopher said. “He wasn’t big on TV. He didn’t even have internet at his house … and he was a penny pincher. He liked to make money and save it.”

However, Mark was not a time pincher.

“He was very generous with his time,” Christopher said. “If you ever needed anything, he was more than willing to help you out, without question, without asking what’s in it for him.”

It was Mark who encouraged Christopher to become a union boilermaker, too, and Mark and Christopher bought their first Harleys together, although Christopher rode his much less after he married and had four children.

Nevertheless, Christopher said Mark helped him work on his house and related well with Christopher’s children, to the extent of getting down on the floor and playing with them. What Christopher didn’t know was the extent of Mark’s ups and downs until Mark’s death on July 4 at the age of 33.

And Christopher said that, because of it, he wants to bring more awareness to the reality of suicide “because people can clearly visually look fine and put on a good front,” he said.

“You just don’t know how much people are hurting inside,” Christopher said. “I don’t know if Mark realized just how many lives he touched.”

Since Mark’s death, Mary and her family have participated in a suicide awareness walk, she said; and Christopher has taken “a couple” motorcycle rides for suicide awareness. He also bought Mark’s Harley from his family and intends to keep it.

“That’s the only way I can try to keep him around,” Christopher said. “I’ll ride his bike.”

• To feature someone in “An Extraordinary Life,” contact Denise M. Baran-Unland at 815-280-4122 or dunland@shawmedia.com.